Me, games, and inconsistency (BEDA 26)

I am such an inconsistent gamer. I may play a game for days on end, then stop… for years. Case in point, “Persona 4 Golden” for the PS Vita. I got the game probably a week or so after it was released. I played endlessly for weeks. Then I just stopped. I think I got stuck trying to beat some boss shadow. Probably got frustrated and put the game down. I do that a lot. I happened to be going through a box and found my Vita again. Persona was still inside, waiting. Seeing the game cartridge made me nostalgic. I actually really liked the game, I shouldn’t have quit.
I am not the greatest gamer. In fact I will be a n00b for the rest of my life, no matter what I’m playing. I am one of those people that has terrible hand/eye coordination. I can’t do the “special move”. I probably don’t even know what the move is. I don’t know how to chain moves together. I can’t “run and gun”, I am not built for that first person shooter life. I can play the hell out of a side scroller though. I am also decent at games with a storyline and missions. I am one of those people that like structure.

 I just get frustrated so easily. If I get stuck in a game, I just give up. I put the game down and stop trying. I need to stop doing that. It’s somewhat of a metaphor for how I have dealt with life. Can’t figure out a solution? Give up. That’s such a loser stance to take. I can’t just give up as soon as there is a little friction. Nothing gets accomplished that way. Time to restart that saved file. 

Just so you know, as terrible as I am at gaming, I still consider myself a “gamer”. I enjoy gaming. If I don’t play, I watch others play. I want to know what game is coming out and when. I like listening to commentary from those “hard core” gamers. I like being a part of the gaming community. To me, that still makes me a gamer. I don’t think being a “gamer” is a title only reserved for the “experts”. There are levels to this. So, I will still call myself a gamer even though I am sporadic as hell and pure trash in most games. That’s my choice.

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The non-gaming gamer girl

So I am probably the weirdest “gamer girl” you will meet. I can’t “game” so to speak but I absolutely LOVE gaming. I don’t have the hand-eye coordination necessary to play 99.9% of the games that are out now. I suck. That’s just the bible truth. I am a side scroll lover. I can get down with Mario all day long. I can play Legend of Zelda decently. Surprisingly, I got pretty good at Persona 4 on the PSP. However, Call of Duty, Battlefield, Halo, are all out of my league. In fact, all first person shooters are beyond me. I am the one that spawns in and dies IMMEDIATELY. Even after all of the just… just… pure fail I still call myself a gamer. Why? Because in my eyes you don’t have to just play games to be considered a gamer. I think the sheer love of gaming can make you a gamer. I am obsessed with Twitch and can spend hours watching people stream. I think it’s cool how amazing other players are. I like to read up on the new games being released. I am fully into the gaming community. To me, that’s enough for me to consider myself a gamer. Maybe I am not a true gamer to some but hey, opinions are opinions, right?

“Nerd” versus “#Nerd”

So being a nerd has become the cool thing to do now. At one time we were ostracized. We were made fun of. We were looked at as weirdos on the fringes of society. Now nerd culture is a hashtag for a lot of people. Glasses and a video game or super hero teeshirt are all it takes to make someone a #nerd apparently. It’s not that I am upset that “nerding out” is more acceptable, I’m not going all “I liked it before it was cool” hipster on you. I think it just bothers me a bit that nerd culture has lost some of its meaning. We nerds, true nerds, have been doing this since we can remember. We were trapped in our books reading until morning, finishing book after book in a week. We were collecting Pokemon cards and trading like we were on Wall Street with million dollar stocks. We were playing the Yugi-Oh trading card game as hard as an old school cook out game of spades. We fought over who got to be player one on Super Mario. We were rushing home to watch the anime that came on Toonami after school and hoping Goku finally used that damn Kamehameha. We were playing Dungeons and Dragons like we were really there. We were saving money to by the new comics to see what happens to Superman next. We found what made us happy and ran head first into it. We were the ones that were called nerds as an insult.  It wasn’t cool and it kind of wasn’t easy either. We were made to believe it wasn’t ok, that we needed to change and fit in more. A lot of us were bullied for it. We still nerded out at every possible chance anyway. Most of us just turned into grown up nerds.

Nowadays, the younger generation of true nerds are being bullied mercilessly for their nerdy obsessions by the same people that put on a pair of big glasses, take a pic, and post it with “#NERD, lol!” as the caption. It’s not fair. So I am talking to you, the up and coming generation of true nerds. You know who you are. You have actually read the “Dark Knight” comics before the movies came out. Your Call of Duty kill streak is something to be admired. You know which Zelda game just from a few notes of the music. You have more games than clothes. You know the sound of the Tardis landing and won’t blink around concrete statues. You patiently wait on the next episode of Sherlock never knowing when it will come. You have a “Supernatural” gif appropriate for any post. You know not to wear the red shirt on the  Starship Enterprise. You have had your emotions destroyed by more books that relationships. You go to comic/anime cons dressed up as something that probably embarrasses your parents and you DO NOT care. Your Minecraft world rivals the real one. You are awesome and let no one tell you otherwise! Continue to obsess over what makes you happy. Don’t let people try to force you to fit in. Don’t let their whispers, their stares, their harsh words bother you. Remember, nerds are cool now. You’re one of the cool kids! You’re the one the stars are coming to comicons to talk to. Be you. Wear your nerdy shirts. Listen to your video game music remixes. Let your friends know it happened totally differently in the book. Continue to be a true nerd. We older nerds have got your back.