Maintenance

“Maintenance required”. That “light” has been on for my relationship for a long time. Our relationship started out just fine. We were happy, we spent time together, we were affectionate… We were in love. Things were great. Then he proposed. You would think this would make things even better. Instead, it killed us. He felt like he no longer had to maintain our relationship. There stopped being a “we” and it became “he” and “I”. Turns out, he never actually wanted to propose. He felt like I made him do it. Rather than talk to me about any of this, he simply emotionally left our relationship. That’s when the “maintenance required” light first came on.

Maintenance stopped on what we had. No more trying. Our relationship slowly began to die from the lack of “upkeep”. He gave up and I guess after all of the crying and yelling, I gave up too. No affection, no love, no time, nothing. He went to work, got off, went straight to see his friends, came home, took a shower, went to sleep. Repeat. I was no longer a part of his life. He decided that he had me and didn’t need to do anything to keep me. The “maintenance required” light was on and screaming at us but nothing was done about it. I tried to talk to him about it. He would always say he was going to try. Nothing would change. Start the cycle over. I watched the “maintenance required” light flash on our relationship for months. I tried to fix it but without help I just didn’t know what I was doing or how to do it. I didn’t have the right “tools”.

Last week our relationship finally broke down. It was a total loss. I realized it was time to let it go. I cried my tears, I let out my anger, dealt with my fears, and I moved out. I am now doing some scheduled maintenance on my own life. I need to fix a few things, replace a few parts. Hopefully this shouldn’t take long.

Advertisements

3 thoughts on “Maintenance

  1. I’ve seen so many relationships end like this. Everyone becomes complacent, no one wants to change, no one wants to try. Happiness has been long forgotten, yet the security of being in a relationship is the only thing making people stay. Especially when trying again with a complete stranger can be very scary, but that’s life I guess. We get what we ask for then unfortunately we take it for granted.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s