>Woe unto the world

So talking to you has been once again, as depressing as talking to Marvin the manic depressive robot. The world is against you. Everything became too hard when mommy died. Everything just keeps going wrong and you don’t know why. I would like to venture a guess and say… MAYBE YOU KEEP DOING THE SAME SHIT OVER AND OVER! You know what? Yes, losing our mother messed you, me, and our other two sisters up. Instead of living for her and thru her you use her death as an excuse to do nothing. It will NEVER be fair what we as a family had to go thru at such young ages but it happened and we have to deal with it at one time or another. It hurts, God knows it is a pain that will never fully subside. My heart hurts just as much as yours and she is on my mind everyday. Losing her is not the reason things are bad for you though. You won’t do anything for yourself. You live with this person and that person. Every guy you have ever dated has been some abusive street thug. You can’t survive in VA so you go back to NC, mind you which you left to come to VA. You have no reason to be in VA or NC but you seem to float in between the two states meeting the worst people. To make matters worse, when your name no longer works for you, you decide mine will do. You fuck me over every way you know how and then dip back to NC where I can’t find you. Rather than just stand up and take it like a woman you slink back into some hidey-hole and wait until the dust settles but I am supposed to feel sorry for you? I can no longer muster up any more sympathy. You have been like this since before mommy died, when you would stay out all night and then get mad because you couldn’t sleep all day. Maybe if you stopped smoking weed long enough to get a job… maybe if you stopped living with any man that opens the door… maybe if you learn to take responsibility… maybe if you FORMULATE A PLAN before you just leave one place going to the next… maybe if you stop feeling sorry for yourself… maybe if you stop living in the past… maybe if you grow the fuck up… maybe, just maybe you can break your cycle.


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